Scary Story


Early before this morning, before the sun rose, I could hear Harper crying. It wasn’t too serious of a cry but I wanted to get to him. As I became more aware I tried to get Willem to let go of me, he nurses a lot in the early morning hours and I didn’t want both my children crying. I was able to work Willem off of me and walked out to find Harper crying in the kitchen! I had locked the baby gate with a dog leash (it clips it closed so Harper can’t lock or unlock it) and apparently he could squeeze past it to get in but now was unable to get back out. I still am clueless as to how or why he was in the kitchen. I took him back to bed where he wanted to sleep as close to me as possible. This wasn’t a big deal but the darn cat wouldn’t leave us alone. So I had to disturb everyone and throw the cat out of the room. I turned around and Harper was crying between me and the dresser, I bent down to console him asking him “what’s wrong bud? Why are you so sad?” and he just looked to his left, towards the ceiling and cried and pointed up at the ceiling.

I told him he was creepy and we went back to bed and to sleep.


Catching up

DSC_0203 IMG_3295 IMG_3300

It’s been a long 2 weeks. Two weeks filled with errands, cleaning and swimming lesson filled days, 2 weeks of nights where I get so caught up in getting the kids to bed, cleaning the living room up, washing the dishes and finishing laundry loads to the point that when I finally sit down to my computer I forget what it is I wanted to look at, to write, to research and I end up mindlessly on Facebook. I don’t want to be mindlessly on Facebook, makes me hate Facebook.

All of that aside it’s been a blissful 2 weeks filled with diaper changes, kissing owies (doctor visits due to owies even), and of course indulging in some tv while my kids pin me down. My current choice is The Unit (via amazon instant video) which is just a more serious version of Army Wives with a spotty ongoing plot but a good variance in drama.

And then there’s the swimming lessons. Only 4 days a week for 2 weeks but as fun as it is it’s also pure torture. The photos are from Harper’s first day. He wasn’t afraid of getting in the water, no that wasn’t our issue, our issue was he didn’t want to hold on to the side and work on his kicks, he wanted to go down the slides. All of them. None of them were on but somehow he managed to get down the kiddy slide twice. Thank God Bridget came to save me and help with Willem (who is also not at all afraid of getting in the water). A week later and I’m fairly confident that Harper will not even be half way to doing all the things he should be doing, his dad and I will work with him on all the things to hopefully better prepare him, but he is having fun. I’m having fun too. He has learned that if I look at my phone that it is probably a good time to dart away from his class so he keeps me on my toes and focused on him. I’m loving the half hour that we are there, we only have 2 classes left and it will be bittersweet but I have more activities planned ahead.

Our Co Sleeping Journey


Before I was pregnant I knew people who coslept, they were hippies and “nesters” or people who coddled their kids. When I was pregnant my mind began to shift. I heard statistics like “in China they don’t even have a term for SIDS because it’s so rare, everyone sleeps with their baby” considering how much I loved the little fetus I wanted to do whatever I could to keep him alive. 

Fast forward to baby’s first day out of the womb. He fell asleep on me who would have the heart to move him? Once home it only got worse. Sure he would nap in his basinet here and there, nap in his swing, fall asleep in the car seat but when it came time for the adults to turn in for the night, there was always a baby in the crook of my arm because to be completely honest I was overly paranoid about SIDS and I slept sooooo much better. Also a huge benefit was being a breastfeeder, when baby stirs in the middle of the night needing to eat all I had to do was pull down my shirt and drift back off to sleep. No getting up. No bottles to warm. Just sweet dreams and a wet puddle of milk on the sheet (I learned to put a towel underneath). 

I said I would cosleep until 6 months. Then I realized that there is still a slim chance for SIDS so I went to 1 year. At 1 year we attempted sleep training. It was heart breaking and not right for us nor for our son plus we admitted to ourselves we loved our little warm snuggler in our bed. Finally at 2 years old we felt comfortable getting him to sleep in his own bed. We didn’t force him, it wasn’t cold turkey, it was gradual and positive. He did amazing sleeping in his own bed. Every night we would go lay down with him, read books, pray, talk, hug. Sometimes he did not want to sleep and we would vice grip him with our body while singing and humming him to sleep, sometimes he’d fall asleep in less than 5 minutes and we would quietly slip out. 

Now at 3 years and 3 months old we no longer cuddle him. We tuck him in and tell him to go to sleep. He still wakes up sometimes and we find him in our bed with us in the morning but we love it and wouldn’t have it any other way.

I guess my reason for writing all this out besides to let our family know that he is officially”weened” from co sleeping, is to encourage others to do whatever feels right for them as parents. We didn’t set out to be cosleepers and we especially didn’t expect to do it for so long but your kids are only little for so long. We wanted Harper to feel safe and secure with us and in his home. We were selfish in that we loved cuddling with him, providing a constant affection between us, but that is just the way we are and luckily with little issue everything turned out perfectly for us. Now we just need to get him out of night time pull ups and he’s officially a big kid! gah good thing I have a new babe in my bed, now I’m a nester hippie