Reading Now

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Reading is a passion I kept on the back burner for the last 4 years. Something about 2 small boys makes it harder to escape into other worlds. Like most things in parenthood we adapt and overcome! I’ve adapted to reading on mobile devices, waking up early and carrying a book with me constantly incase I find the rare parking-lot-nap. So here are the books from this year- thus far.

Kids books:

Marcel the Shell The Most Surprised I Have Ever Been- I picked this book out because of the art and simple, fun to read sentences but after finding out that there are videos, hilarious videos, Marcel has become a true character to me and is one of my favorite books to read to the boys.

Alice in Wonderland- always a fan of the BabyLit books this one is at the top of the list because it focuses on colors.

Honk Honk Beep Beep- picked this board book out for Willem at Target because it featured a red jeep. It is pretty fun to read and Willem has really taken to the “honk honk beep beep” part.

Iphone: I never thought I’d be a fan of reading books on my phone but when you have a baby or toddler it is a Godsend. I love reading books while nursing Willem to sleep because it keeps my screen dark, preventing distraction and it gives me something to do besides fall asleep with him. Not only does it do a great job keeping me awake, I often end up staying longer than usual so I can finish my chapter. There is some slight carpel tunnel pain once in a while but the pain is worth it. A kindle or iPad isn’t the same because it isn’t as easily held and it will hurt your baby more when it does slip out of your hand and onto their head.

Right now I’m reading the Divergent series on my phone, it’s an easy read that keeps me interested and awake. I am halfway through the 3rd book and I started the first one at the beginning of January.

Library books: I borrowed two books from the library

1. Gone Girl- decent book, wonderful writing, okay story. Good twists but nothing terribly unpredictable, the ending made it worth it to me.

2. In the Kingdom of Ice- I’d been looking forward to reading this for a while but only 3 chapters in and a week into my checkout I had an email saying it was overdue. Apparently you can only keep in-demand books for a single week. The library is now useless to my reading needs.

Paperbacks: My old love and forever favorite. I started the year with the intention of reading early in the morning by my window, coffee in hand. This works some of the time. I’m burning through books somehow still.

The Heart is a Lonely Hunter- this is my second attempt at this book. It’s not that it is uninteresting, just slowish. I’ve not picked it up in 2 weeks and made it 2 chapters further than last time.

The Power of One- This is the book I’m currently on as it came very highly recommended by a helpful lady at my local book store. I’m enjoying it so far and looking forward to going back and buying more as it’s such a great shop.

Other books that I’ve gone through recently:

Orphan Train- Great easy read, I’d recommend for a trip or vacation as it doesn’t take up all your attention but is still good.

Beautiful You- I haven’t finished because I kept thinking “Really?” it’s turning out to be a better written 50 Shades but I’m determined to finish for Palahniuk’s twists.

Middlesex (finally)- Best read in recent history, glad I went back to it.

Lets Explore Diabetes with Owls- Funny and short stories are great to read when you never know how long you have to actually read.

Harper Answers Questions (about me) Poorly

  • DSC_0203What is something mom always says to you? 
shanti shanti shanti (Really I don’t but we were just talking about it)
  • What makes mom happy? 
dad
  • What make mom sad? When you get mad at daddy
  • How does your mom make you laugh? 
tickles
  • What was your mom like as a child? 
a girl
  • How old is your mom? 
78
  • How tall is your mom? 
big!
  • What is her favorite thing to do? 
go outside
  • What does your mom do when you’re not around? 
get lost
  • If your mom becomes famous, what will it be for? 
huh?
  • What is your mom really good at? 
sitting down
  • What is your mom not very good at? 
being a bad guy
  • What does your mom do for a job? 
make hot dogs
  • What is your mom’s favorite food? 
blueberries
  • What makes you proud of your mom? 
happy
  • If your mom were a cartoon character, who would she be? 
a game
  • What do you and your mom do together? work
  • How are you and your mom the same? 
like Harper!
  • How are you and your mom different? 
Willem
  • How do you know your mom loves you? 
”I love you Harper!
  • What does your mom like most about your dad? happy
  • Where is your mom’s favorite place to go? 
yoga!

I borrowed these questions from some friends Facebook posts. I asked Harper while he ate lunch, hoping to get more of his focus- I was wrong. Between his speech delay and extremely poor attention span this was not as much fun as I had hoped but I want to save and savor him at this age. I will ask again in a few months, see how he’s grown, and if his views of me have changed.

Why I’m Bad at Making Friends

A few years ago I took a pretty in depth personality quiz. I remember it was long and I remember hearing “if you get this answer (the answer I did get) then you probably don’t have a lot of friends.” For some that might seem harsh but in my mind I thought: Yes! I haven’t had many friends, I can’t help that, it’s just how God made me! I was fairly relieved to have an excuse as to why I didn’t seem to have a gaggle of girls to go to constantly, even my bridal party was a one person party, my sister. To further explain the “you have no friends” answer it was answered that I tend to be overly honest, blunt, loud, and I have a general social disability when it comes to taking the first steps in a friendship. Add in the fact that I wear my emotions on my face (and my emotions are usually disapproval for some reason) and you do not have someone with many close friends.

This girl is definitely a soul mate of mine. We are destined to be together even my husband has commented that we can never move because she and I can not be separated.

This girl is definitely a soul mate of mine. We are destined to be together even my husband has commented that we can never move because she and I can not be separated.

So growing up I constantly had a good girl friend but it was usually only one. Don’t worry, I still had friends, most of them boys, some girls but I usually kept them at arms length because I didn’t need a large amount of friends it felt like too much responsibility when I just wanted to play, I just one or two really good ones to rely on and in return I was a good and reliable friend to them. Even from a young age I hated drama and kept it to a minimum.

I remember when we moved across town the summer after 4th grade. I attached myself to the other new girl when we started 5th grade at our new school. When October came around I asked her point blank if she would go trick or treating with me, really I had no one else to go with because she and I were the only two that lived in our new development, but she liked soccer and also had dark hair and freckles like I did. After that we stuck together and played every day except Sundays and Wednesdays. Right before 7th grade I moved to Arizona, and Megan came to visit during spring break, she confessed that she did not like me  before I asked her to go trick or treating (I was loud and confident or as I like to say now, I was a boss), she had no one else to go with so she said yes. This confession actually did not hurt me, it did surprise me a little but it more just reaffirmed how I had always felt about myself.

High school friends. These 2 are some of my oldest friends. What's great is even though we met at 14 they have grown into awesome women that I still adore. This picture was from my wedding 5 years ago! Haven't seen them in almost that long but I know we pick right up where we left off. I have to add that they are some of the most fun girls I've ever met.

High school friends. These 2 are some of my oldest friends. What’s great is even though we met at 14 they have grown into awesome women that I still adore. This picture was from my wedding 5 years ago! Haven’t seen them in almost that long but I know we pick right up where we left off. I have to add that they are some of the most fun girls I’ve ever met.

This is how my life has played out. I wear my emotions on my face too often. I’m timid about approaching other females, and in return they see me as intimidating (my college roommates would tell me this later after remembering our first encounter where I said little to them because I was shy, yet they saw it as aloofness).

Now that we live in a place I consider our forever home I’ve revisited what it is to make friends again especially with kids in tow. Many moms feel anxiety when it comes to making friends. Part of this is just the everyday stress that having kids creates making it hard to make plans or even phone calls but another part is the fact that we have created or been warned about mommy wars. We want to be friends with those that support us so if we feel like we are being judged for whatever parenting choice we make shy away from others who are not in the same situation making of a whole new level of insecurity. This isn’t good, plain and simple, on both ends we need to be more open, willing to put ourselves out there and more accepting of those that do not make the same choices we do. I look for friends who are understanding, support me, keep me honest and are honest with me (and preferably love wine, food, don’t mind messes, are flexible and laugh a lot). I accept them how they are and hopefully they do the same for me. I look forward to making new friends, I feel like I can pick them out pretty easily but it’s hard for me to make the right steps towards companionship without being super awkward.

This beautiful new mom is another long time friend that doesn't live close but that doesn't matter. I love that we started friends as single ladies and that motherhood has made us even closer. We know each others life stories pretty intimately, she's my go to person when it comes to matters in Christ.

This beautiful new mom is another long time friend that doesn’t live close but that doesn’t matter. I love that we started friends as single ladies and that motherhood has made us even closer. We know each others life stories pretty intimately, she’s my go to person when it comes to matters in Christ. 

So what is my friendship situation like currently? I’m in love with my long-term friends that are spread all around the states and here in S. Dakota. I’d say I have two very close friends that I can lean on anytime and a few more that I’m hoping grown into great friendships. I feel supported and loved, I am not alone, it’s encouraging and wonderful, a nice way to live.

If you are a mom or are moving to a new area or both here is what I suggest to make friends: Find local activities, MOPS groups, Hike it Baby groups, find a local church that you like, get a part time job, volunteer, go to library story times, sign up for an adult education class, or join a yoga studio. Find something that you like to do, be brave and put yourself out there and the universe will bring you someone to you, be patient and open, sometimes the really good ones take a while to appear.