Harpers First Bad Word


Part of the reason I started this blog or online journal was to enable to permentatly putting down some of the stories from my kids growing up. I feel like I have a new one at least every other day so I should be writing more…. but I have kids and they keep me too busy (they are always the best excuse).

On Saturday Chad took me in the backyard “I have to tell you something, come here.” Harper attempted to follow but Chad shooed him back inside. “While you were gone we where sitting on the couch watching tv. I said shoot and Harper said:

“Dad, dad, hold on. Quiet (meaning pause the tv). Want to hear something?”

“buuuuullll sheeeeet”

Then he smiled.

Chad took a moment no gather himself (in order not to bust out laughing). And told Harper that wasn’t an appropriate phrase for a kid, that we don’t say those words and they are considered bad words. What more could he say?

Later that afternoon in the car I asked Harper what he did with his dad while I was gone and he repeated the words. I reinforced that we don’t say that, I better not hear him say it again and that the next time he hears Max (the neighbor boy who taught him those words) say it that he should tell Max that those aren’t nice words to use either.

To be perfectly honest Harper has been saying “hot damn” for the last 6 months thanks to the Bruno Mars song but I suppose we don’t really consider “damn” as bad as “bull shit” especially considering the context.

Still, it was an interesting parenting milestone.


Neutral Baby Wish List

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Not knowing the sex of baby 3 has not deterred my online browsing. There are a few things I plan on looking at specifically (new swaddle blankets) once we know if this baby is a boy or girl but for now it looks like I love black, white and grays. Some of the things on my list:
1. HALO Bassinest– At first I didn’t think we needed a bassinet, just our handy dandy pack and play that has the bassinet option. Then I remembered what a pain in the butt it is to get out of bed past the pack and play, scooting down to the edge of the bed or squeezing my thighs in-between the bed and bars of the p’n’p. Not fun. AND THEN I found this handy dandy thing on Amazon. It has a skinny base, is easily moved and swivels in a full circle but the best part: the bar closest to the bed drops down for easy transitions of sleepy baby from bed to basinet. Now I’m thinking this might be a must.
2. Sakura Bloom chambray ring sling in Marin- Most who know me know I love wearing babies. It just makes life easier plain and simple. I love Sakura Bloom slings for quality as well as sleekness because I also love simple solids over prints. I’ve been waiting to buy a chambray for a long time and while I hope to buy a new silk sling as well, that one I’d like to wait to chose a color after we know (as much as I love purple I just don’t think I can put a baby boy in purple). Marin is a blue/white almost like denim and goes with everything I own.
3. Mabo Kids trousers- how amazing are these colors? I’ve been drooling over chartreuse forever, better believe baby 3 will live in them.
4. Mar Mar Copenhagen– MarMar makes some seriously cute stuff for boys and girls. Simple and timeless but also a lot of modern prints. I found a fun print that’s good for boys or girls, of course neutral gray and sweet rouched sleeves that don’t make it feminine as much as it makes it infant and sweet. Doesn’t hurt that it’s super soft as well (may have purchased this one already).
5. MamaROO by 4Moms– I’ve been in awe of this beauty since we were pregnant with Harper and saw it swaying back and forth at Buy Buy Baby. Fortunately the price point on this has dropped since then, unfortunately it’s still on the higher end. We did have a wonderful swing for Harper and Willem but when you aren’t sure if there’s a third child in store for you it is a huge inconvenience to store such a big baby item so I sold it at a garage sale knowing full well that if we had another I’d want this swing anyway.
6. Klean Kanteen baby bottle– because how cool is a stainless steel baby bottle?! Perfect for all the camping this baby will be doing when it’s teeny tiny.
7. California Baby Calendula Cream– I am obsessed with the smell of California Baby calendula anything, that mixed with my poor offsprings tendencies towards skin irritation and excema and this tub will be gone in no time.
8.NaturSutton BPA-Free Natural Ruber Pacifier– I prefer the term pacifier over all the other nicknames they get but this one definitely looks like it should be called a dummy. Honestly I just think it looks kind of cool and want to try it but at $9 a pop I can’t imagine we will have more than a couple when I can buy our good ol Nuk’s at Target anytime for much less.
9. Stella & Wilbur Bonnets– Love these and you can customize them with linings, poms and bear ears. I will most likely wait to get one until I know what this baby is but this denim bonnet is such a beauty I couldn’t resist in adding it.
10. Jasmine Diffuser– I’m too afraid to put essential oils on a baby but diffusing is my jam. Must get one to put close to the bassinet since the other one is in constant use with On Guard in our living area and probably will be well until next summer.

Finding out the Sex of Baby 3

First off. No. I don’t know yet.


Before we where pregnant with this baby I wondered IF we ever had another would I want to find out the sex before birth? We did with Harper, we didn’t with Willem, another could be a tie breaker. Once I was pregnant I did want to know but I was going to give the option to Chad- luckily within a couple hours of hearing about this baby he said “we should find out this time.” Good man.

Why I want to find out: With Willem we chose to try the surprise route, to see what all the fuss was about to see and announce at birth. I have to admit as much as I hated not knowing I loved torturing everyone else as well. Then, at the birth, I was the first one to look, to announce anyway he was a boy. Yes I felt joy and excitement over a boy and a brother for Harper, in the end I was underwhelmed by whether or not the baby was a boy or girl. Instead, I was over the moon excited about the little person I was looking at, he was an amazing baby to look at with lots of dark hair and the chubbiest cheeks. Not to mention his size! I was on an absolute birth high and obsessed with this new little person and I would have been no matter what his assigned sex was. The baby was the exciting part everything else was just gravy.

In finding out at an anatomy scan (when one typically finds out) I feel like its spreading out the excitement a little more. No matter what I’ll still be waiting 20-22 more weeks to see what this little person really looks like, how big they are, how long his or her fingers are, their demeanor so why not celebrate knowing one little secret halfway through.

The issue I’m finding is the closer I get to finding out the more obsessed I get with wanting to know. Last week I went to CareNet for a free ultrasound. I went there mostly for a peek at baby in hopes of easing my anxiety, one of those pesky pregnancy issues, but also knowing there was a small chance at finding out what was between this baby’s legs. No luck though it was fun to guess (we saw nothing between the legs from the bottom, saw a nub from the side and then baby crossed its legs). I’ve given in to attempting to decipher old wives tales (though I put zero stock in them). Did you know some web sites say that if you dangle your wedding ring over your stomach and it sways back and forth it’s a boy then the next site says back and forth means that it’s a girl? There are also some crazy tests involving mixing urine and baking soda, something with boiling red cabbage, the widening of your nose, the rate at which your hair grows… it goes on and on. One theory is based on how you carry baby, here is the comparable of my pregnancy with Willem (left) and baby 3 (right) both around 15 weeks. Now, if you grow high and straight out it’s said that baby is male, if wide and low, female. Or maybe I’m just getting used to this growing babies things and my body expands however the heck it wants to, well that and I can’t stop eating cinnamon toast crunch.


I’m tired of speculating. I’m ready to know. The beautiful thing is, like with Willem, I (we) truly have no preference for either sex although Harper has told me that if it is a girl he doesn’t want it and we should have a boy instead. Not sure how that works.

Playing Favorites With My Kids


Sometimes one of my kids does something amazingly cute, or says something amazingly cute, or simply just walks in a cute way and I think to myself “Oh my, he is the best, he’s my favorite of the little people I live with.” I relish the moment and begin to think about the other kid. Honestly there is always something equally as cute and I think “How can I ever pick a favorite, look how amazing he is as well!” It’s a vicious circle of not being able to pick one, though thankfully, one does not need to be picked.

Before we had Willem we wondered if we could ever love him as much as we did Harper, obviously we did and still do. It’s crazy how that really does work.

Example 1: Tonight after Willem fell asleep Harper got out of bed and chatted with me. He was super sweet, asking about the new baby, we talked about feeding babies with bottles and discussed his diaper changing duties (he’s to grab diapers and wipes as needed but I will do the actually changing). Eventually I forced our chat to an end and walked him back to bed thinking about how much I loved that time with him and he is definitely my favorite, when I saw Willem fast asleep in bed in the pajamas he picked out and put on himself my heart melted fully- no way could I pick one kid over the other.

Example 2: When I leave the house to do errands, I always offer to take a kid, one kid is always easier than 2 when leaving the house. Willem is very easy to take out and behaves wonderfully in public so I feel like I would favor him. Harper is not nearly as well-behaved and can tend to be crazy in public but he’s fun! I love talking to him and I love when he says “hi” to random people, even conversations in the car can be highly entertaining so I love taking him as well.

Chad on the other hand has an easy time picking favorites, just yesterday he blatently claimed one of them as his favorite (I can’t tell you here incase the boys read this when they are older) and he had a valid reason for it. He didn’t say he loved this kid more, he just preferred spending time with him more that day.

I also know my parents played favorites, sure they loved us equally, but there is/was some definite favoritism as there is in most families. Any seasoned parent (one whose kids are grown) will inform you that some kids just make it easier on you, then you tend to “favor” them as the others see it. I’m waiting to see if this is true for me because as of now I have a somewhat sickening preference for both of my kids. Maybe their young age and innocence just makes them equally endearing to me? I’ll let you know in another 5 years if it’s turning true or not.